I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Thursday, November 3, 2022


Once upon a time in the ‘80s, a man walked into a gas station and fell for an attendant 20+ years his junior. Nine months later, this little bitch writing this was born. Yes, my parental units failed to make it last longer than a few years but to this day, they’re still amazingly good friends. This made me think, other than maturity moving forward, what are some other benefits to dating an older man? It’s time to take a look at them all and possibly encourage some of you to tackle the silver foxes out there instead of dealing with the immature otters, bears, and so forth that are sniffing around.


More years on their plate means they have more experience in every aspect of life - usually. They’ve had more time on earth to do all the things on a basic suburban mom’s decor; live, laugh, and love. Also, fucking. While experience in life is great, you cannot deny that someone who has years of sexual experience under his belt is more intriguing than someone who doesn’t know their way around a cock ring. Dating an older man could be eye-opening in a lot of ways, but sexually - you are going to be traveling down a well-worn path that has been there and done almost everything. Plus, what they haven’t done, those new things, you can teach them! So think of their path as a two-way street of sexual knowledge expansion.


There are two ideal situations when it comes to privacy and an older gentleman. First off, there is a certain age when people tend to not have a gaggle of roommates. Meaning that when you hook up at their place, you don’t have to worry about anyone else listening in. Well, except maybe the neighbors if either of you are like a banshee in the bedroom. Secondly, older and wise people barely fuck around with social media. This means that what you two do isn’t always going to be displayed for public consumption. If you’ve been looking for someone who isn’t attached to their phone and posting every second of the day, then older is the route to go.


That gas station attendant who became my mom always said, the older you get the less you care WTF people think about you, and mama was right! So while you may nitpick every aspect of your ensemble, body, and being before leaving the house - that older man more than likely does not. This means they are comfortable with themselves and less likely to care about anything you may be insecure about. Hell, they’ll probably wind up praising those little “problems” you may think you have because all he sees is a hot, young person standing before him.


At this point in time, older men are still boomers, which means they came from a generation that took their finances seriously. This is also because they grew up in a time where college and homes cost like a nickel. So when you hook up with someone from that generation, oh know he’s going to be stable in the bank account department. Meaning you don’t have to fuck up your funds dealing with someone who doesn’t have their shit together.


Sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes dating a guy even in their 30’s can be like taking care of a child. With an older man, that’s more than likely not going to be the case because of all of the above and then some. You don’t have to worry about them showing up to your family function in sweats and a wrinkled tee, canceling on you and your friends last minute because they lost track of time playing video games, nor do you have to play all those stupid games because an older man ain’t got time for all that.


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