I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Monday, July 18, 2022


I’m the big black muscle guy that looks like a top, I am in my early 20s and I’m beefy as hell, so most men think I’m in my early 30s. I’m also a complete submissive bitch, but most guys don’t expect that out of me. I’m not opposed to topping, but I only like to top guys that I know will be around for a while (like a FWB or a romantic interest). I’ve been told I’m handsome and all of that, but all guys want is the lightweight twink they can throw around. All of my hookups have called me a big dude in a good way, but it seems like it isn’t the dream. Plus I’m black so everybody thinks I’m a top as well.

I want you to know that when you approach me at the bar or online and you assume I’m a top, or that I’m hung, or that I’m hung and a top, I feel dehumanized. “It feels like you’re reducing me to a thing that can perform a service for you, not like a mutual bond, the way sex should be.

“When you’re a black gay guy, bottoming is a political stance. It’s a small way of saying, I don’t want to play the game of upholding dehumanizing stereotypes and images. I don’t want to confirm media and cultural stereotypes about black ‘virile’ masculinity.”

Have you ever been in this situation?

What are your thoughts?

What advice would you give this person?

1 comment:

  1. I believe there's someone for everyone πŸ˜‰ So it fits perfectly for both πŸ‘ŒπŸ»

    The right way IMO is to be optimistic, let all the negative experiences go & go forward πŸ™‚