The moments after learning you’re HIV-positive can seem like a
virtual free fall. In a matter of seconds, you are sent into a tailspin of
what-if scenarios and your vision is filled with horrific images from a bad
movie montage. Your mind races, then stalls completely, working in frantic fits
and spurts and grasping onto the nuggets of information you can remember about
what it is to be HIV-positive today.
The nurse tells you that you are going to be just fine and that HIV
is now a manageable disease. The doctor tells you that if you take care of
yourself, you can expect to live the same amount of time as you would have if
you were HIV-negative. But still, there is an inescapable fear of the unknown.
What does it mean to live with HIV? What is going to have to change in your
life, and more importantly, what can you expect to remain the same?
You aren’t alone. There are so many others who have gone through
the exact same thing and have already asked all the same burning questions that
you need to know the answers to. Below are some quick answers to those
questions you probably have.
What do I do now?
The first thing to do is to stop panicking. You are the same person who walked
into the clinic before receiving your test results. It may seem like everything
has changed, but it hasn’t. Still, there are some things you can do to ease
your mind and find your way back to being OK.
Find a doctor who is highly knowledgeable about HIV and is the
right fit for you. You might be surprised about how uneducated your average
family doctor is about HIV and how to treat it. The last thing you need is to
be treated by a doctor who has just as many questions as you have. There are
many HIV specialists who know exactly how to treat you, and that includes how
to ease your concerns. These doctors can also act as your primary physician,
who will keep your HIV diagnosis in mind when minor health issues arise along
the way.
I found a doctor — now what?
During your first appointment, your doctor will do your initial lab work. This
is to see what your CD4 count and viral load is. Your CD4 count is the number
of disease-fighting white blood cells you have in your body and your viral load
is the number of copies of HIV that are in your system. Your doctor will also
determine whether the virus you have is resistant to any medications, which is
unlikely.
This sounds scary, but it doesn’t have to be. No matter what your
CD4 count may be, most people can bring their count up by simply taking a
single-pill regimen. The same medication can also reduce your viral load to an
undetectable level, making it highly improbable for you to transmit the virus
to someone else. Most likely, this will be the extent of managing your virus,
along with regular checkups with your doctor to make sure that your body is
healthy and that your medication is working. The key to staying healthy and
keeping an undetectable viral load is to never miss a dose — just as you should
with medication for any other ailment.
Can I only have sex with other people who are also HIV-positive?
Of course not! Today, there are multiple ways to have safe sex, and believe it
or not, most men are knowledgeable enough to know that informed sex is the
safest sex of all, regardless of status. Again, staying compliant with your
meds and maintaining an undetectable viral load is the best way to ensure that
you never transmit the virus. This method of prevention is for your protection
just as much as it is for your partner.
How will I tell my friends and family?
First off, you don’t have to tell anyone except your future sexual partners.
But talking about your status may be the best way for you to feel like yourself
again. There are probably other people around you who are either HIV-positive
or have been affected by HIV in one way or another. The first time you tell
someone may be scary, but it gets easier every time. The first step is to just
say the three little letters out loud. Start there.
What does it mean to manage my virus?
For most people who are diagnosed today, managing your virus simply means being
compliant with a one-pill-a-day regimen. Once you find a doctor, start
medication, and achieve an undetectable viral load, you will just need to have
your lab work done every four months or so to make sure that everything is all
right.
Am I going to die?
Here’s the deal. A person diagnosed today has roughly the same life expectancy
as a person who is HIV-negative. However, your virus does make you more
susceptible to several other health problems that you need to be aware of. Some
of these are cardiovascular disease, kidney problems, and bone density loss.
But before you start to panic again, know that these can be prevented with the
proper care. Being knowledgeable about what to look out for is the best way to
ensure a long and healthy life.
Am I going to get AIDS?
The term AIDS does seem scarier than HIV, doesn’t it? The truth is, many people
who are living with HIV will never be diagnosed with AIDS. HIV is a virus; AIDS
is a diagnosis that a person receives once the virus reaches a certain point.
When your CD4 count dips below 200 and your immune system is so damaged that
common illnesses can be life-threatening, your disease is classified as AIDS.
As long as you stay on your medication and keep a healthy body and mind, you
can keep your CD4 count in the healthy zone and far away from the level of
AIDS. And if your CD4 count is already in the danger zone, the correct
medication can bring you back up to healthy levels.
Your diagnosis is not the end of anything, but it may be the beginning of
living a more informed and health-conscious life.
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