Anger, when channeled into the pursuit of change, can be a useful tool in our
emotional palette. Anger is experienced by most people, some more than
others. It is when anger has no outlet and morphs into resentment that it
carries with it the potential to cause great turmoil. Allowing us to assign
blame for the pain we are feeling, thereby easing it, resentment tends to
smolder relentlessly just below the surface of our awareness, eroding our peace
of mind. The target of our resentment grows ever more wicked in our minds and
we rue the day we first encountered them. But resentment is merely another hue
on the emotional palette and therefore within the realm of our conscious
control. We can choose to let go of our resentment and to move on with our
lives, no matter how painful the event that incited it.
Hanging onto resentment in our hearts does not serve us in any way.
Successfully divesting ourselves of resentful feelings can be difficult,
however, because doing so forces us to mentally and emotionally confront the
original source of anger. When we cease assigning blame, we realize that our
need to hold someone or something responsible for our feelings has harmed us.
We thought we were coping with our hurt when in fact we were holding onto that
hurt with a vice grip. To release resentment, we must shift our attention from
those we resent back toward ourselves by thinking of our own needs. Performing
a short ceremony can help you quell resentful feelings by giving tangible form
to your emotions. You may want to write down your feelings and then burn the
paper and close your ceremony by wishing them well. When you can find
compassion in your heart, you know you are on your way to
healing.
Free of resentment, we have much more energy and attention to devote to our
personal development. We can fill the spaces it left behind with unconditional
acceptance and joy. And, as a result of our subsequent freedom from resentment,
blessings can once again enter our lives as the walls we built to contain our
anger have been demolished.
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