There's a phenomenon sweeping
the GAY community: men
having sex with each @ rapid pace; and @ the heart of this issue are many
contributing factors. Homophobia against GAY men is just one of the culprits. Moreover, there are
some lingering self-esteem issues that simply prove that GAY MEN
JUST DON’T KNOW HOW TO BE MEN! As little
boys most if NOT all of
us did our fair share of sexual exploration with the same AND opposite sex. Back then it was done out of curiosity AND innocence; what is OUR excuse today? How do we still have sex as if we are
still kids AND somehow
never manage to never get pass our childhood way of thinking when it comes to
sex?
So many of we GAY men see sex as a testing phase that requires us to
find as many partners as we can; it’s as if there is an open season on sex and
hunter AND prey is on a
collision course that will produce dire consequences. The GAY man is playing Russian roulette with his essence AND destroying the beautiful thing we
call sex. It has always been my assumption that sex represents FREEDOM
& LIBERATION, instead WE have this PHYSICAL, EMOTIONLESS &
PSYCHOLOGICAL thing that takes us away
from the REAL meaning of
sex. I often wonder how things got this bad so fast. I guess in a broader
sense, this question is rooted in the social facts that we are all aware of the
decline of the GAY community
AND how HIV/AIDS has taken a STRONG hold there; yet we do NOTHING to bring ourselves out this bondage that WE have created.
Hence it if one was to examine
the complexities AND contradictions
of the GAY man; one
would see that HIS sexual
behavior is the root of the problem. Can anyone tell me what is it about the
thrill that drives us to indulge in this activity with so many? This insatiable
hopping from one man to the next is NOT a duty. How is it that we can’t seem be anything to
each other beyond the physical? We are NOTHING more than laboratory rat that are gathering evidence
proving that GAY men are
all about anal sex. I get that to some extent that this level of physical AND sexual intimacy is in its own right some form of
sexual healing. MY ONLY QUESTION HOW LONG DOES IT LAST? MORE
IMPORTANTLY, HOW DOES ONE CULTIVATE A PROFOUND SENSE OF IDENTITY IN THIS WAY?
Hence what we ultimately end up
with is an access to an elite male experience, and intercourse with a set of
beliefs and ideas about HOMOSEXUALITY that WE somehow created. This dilemma is that part of what
they feel like they are not getting from themselves AND it is also connected to what they feel they are not
getting from society as well. In the long run the things that are going on
today will NO doubt have
grave affects for us tomorrow. Overall, I believe this phenomenon is affecting
us because it provides somewhat of a safety valve for us to hide this issue.
Deep down inside I believe that the GAY man wants to nurture and be nurtured; however that can
only happen in a relationship.
IN GENERAL, THESE MEN HAVE FEARS ABOUT NOT BEING
SEEN BOTH FOR WHO THEY ARE AS A
COMMUNITY & AS INDIVIDUALS. IN ADDITION, FOR SOME REASON THEY FEAR NOT
FINDING THAT CONNECTION TO ANOTHER MAN & @ THE SAME TIME THINKING THAT IF
THEY ALTER THEIR SEXUAL BEHAVIOR IT WOULD SOMEHOW PUT THEM ON THE OUTSIDE OF
THE HOMOSEXUAL CIRCLE. I KNOW ALL TOO WELL THAT THE GAY MAN HAS A LOT TO DEAL
WITH, FROM BEING FEARED, HATED & STOMPED ON…BUT HE HAS TO RISE ABOVE THAT
FOR HIS SAKE. IN ORDER FOR US TO CHANGE, WE MUST INCREASE OUR ABILITY TO
DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THINKING, FEELING & LEARNING HOW TO RESOLVE THINGS IN
LIVES. THIS ISSUE MUCH LIKE EVERYTHING IN LIFE GOES ON & NO ONE TALKS ABOUT
IT. WHEN IT COMES TO THINGS THAT DIRECTLY AFFECT OUR INTERACTION &
ATTITUDES WITH EACH OTHER, THE VERY FOUNDATION FOR HOW WE RESPOND TO THIS
SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM SHOWS THAT WE LACK THE ARTICULATION & KNOWLEDGE TO
CHANGE THINGS. BUT LET US NOT FORGET THAT THE REAL WAR ON THE GAY MAN IS
OVERWHELMING NEED TO COMPETE WITH THE HETEROSEXUAL MAN. HENCE I SAY IT IS TIME
FOR US TO RECLAIM OUR MANHOOD & EMBRACE WHO WE ARE AS MEN. SEX IS NICE, BUT
YOUR SELF-WORTH SHOULD NOT BE DECIDED BY YOUR WILLINGNESS TO HAVE SEX WITH
ANOTHER MAN…IT SHOULD BE TIED TO YOUR RESPECT & APPRECIATION FOR WHO YOU
ARE…
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