The gay movement and the community it created emerged from what was arguably the worst period of REPRESSION & PERSECUTION of the "SEXUALLY DEVIANT" the world has ever known. That persecution, so widespread in its extent, and reaching into almost country and every social class, had an exceptionally destructive effect on those gay people and communities that managed to survive. And in my opinion I feel that we fought back; but in a major negative way. I feel that in order to preserve their identities they have decided to protect a source of pleasure, by not merely sex with another man, but sex with lots of other men. I wonder if I try to take away their 'IDENTIFICATION' that I will be seen as 'HOMOPHOBIC?' I would like to change the way our community thinks and how they behave; because I wonder why then do present-day gay men believe that promiscuity is so central to whom they are? I mean think about it; so many of our ideas about sex, the notion that all gay men are promiscuous is cultural, political, and relative. SO I ASK WHY IS THIS OUR THOUGHT? I can place the blame on the easiest thing available to us the INTERNET! GAY MEN, THE INTERNET AND SEX HAVE BECOME SYNONYMOUS OVER THE YEARS. This place where you can be anyone you so choose, this place where you log on, get off and get out in minutes has heightened the need for sexual gratification in more ways than one. Face it, this place is 99% PORN and 1% OTHER. Internet behavior is the perception of anonymity. It is a cultural norm to be able to put a photograph in the profile out there that does not have a face, it does not have a name associated and I think that there is a level of personal safety that you believe you have, giving the fact that you think people cannot identify you. So you can write your profile as a modified code, hoping other people will read it the same way and then you can have a combination of emails exchanged or messages exchanged that allows you to kind of refine where and what behavior you choose to go to and then, if you want to have that next step, you can display your face. The downside of that is, more often than not, in such small locations that we have, you end up knowing who the people are even before you see the face shot, and once you get more and more comfortable and you find less and less fear based on whatever program you are in, you start to change those images. But I really do think a lot of it is based on comfort level of perceived anonymity. Knowing this, I don't want to blame the internet for us taking advantage of world that tries to keep us down. I however want to acknowledge that this medium allows us to FIND, FUCK, FOOL & FORGET a man in a blink of an eye. In this world today time is short and who wants to deal something that isn't working? The internet allows us to escape situations where we meet face to face, who wants to summon up the effort to talk to somebody and to break the ice and to ask them to come home with you; whereas the internet, everybody is there for the same reason; it is very quick, it is very easy. The other reason I feel these 'BULLSHITNIGGAHZ' are making the problem within our community worst is for the mere fact that they are just a continuum of what is happening offline. Safe sex does not seem to hold much meaning; they intend to FUCK safely but rarely do and will continue to put themselves in mortal danger. I know they mean well, they place safe sex only on that profile on BGC & A4A, then they meet up, more than likely there is no discussion about it because, let's say I responded to an ad that said "safer sex only" or we both wrote "safer sex only." However, for me, "safer sex" is "no unprotected anal intercourse" and, for you, "safer sex" is "no anal intercourse at all." And then that is not being discussed. So then you get together and you think that you are going to have a particular kind of experience, you are already there, you are already aroused, and you have SEX because it would be such a shame to waste the time. I wonder why we live our lives as if we are KIDS IN A CANDY STORE? Yes it is fun and exciting, but how does this affect our community as a whole? Can we truly say we are happy with the way we allow the internet to make us hide from the world? How can we not see that we might be winning the battle but not the war? One has to look at the entire culture. For so long as gay men believe that they are defined by promiscuity and anal sex the internet will continue to serve the very thing that is destroying our community. We have to make serious demands upon ourselves as gay men that have too little to do with pleasure, and too much to do with culture and ideology.
Monday, October 9, 2006
WWW.BULLSHITNIGGAHZ.COM
The gay movement and the community it created emerged from what was arguably the worst period of REPRESSION & PERSECUTION of the "SEXUALLY DEVIANT" the world has ever known. That persecution, so widespread in its extent, and reaching into almost country and every social class, had an exceptionally destructive effect on those gay people and communities that managed to survive. And in my opinion I feel that we fought back; but in a major negative way. I feel that in order to preserve their identities they have decided to protect a source of pleasure, by not merely sex with another man, but sex with lots of other men. I wonder if I try to take away their 'IDENTIFICATION' that I will be seen as 'HOMOPHOBIC?' I would like to change the way our community thinks and how they behave; because I wonder why then do present-day gay men believe that promiscuity is so central to whom they are? I mean think about it; so many of our ideas about sex, the notion that all gay men are promiscuous is cultural, political, and relative. SO I ASK WHY IS THIS OUR THOUGHT? I can place the blame on the easiest thing available to us the INTERNET! GAY MEN, THE INTERNET AND SEX HAVE BECOME SYNONYMOUS OVER THE YEARS. This place where you can be anyone you so choose, this place where you log on, get off and get out in minutes has heightened the need for sexual gratification in more ways than one. Face it, this place is 99% PORN and 1% OTHER. Internet behavior is the perception of anonymity. It is a cultural norm to be able to put a photograph in the profile out there that does not have a face, it does not have a name associated and I think that there is a level of personal safety that you believe you have, giving the fact that you think people cannot identify you. So you can write your profile as a modified code, hoping other people will read it the same way and then you can have a combination of emails exchanged or messages exchanged that allows you to kind of refine where and what behavior you choose to go to and then, if you want to have that next step, you can display your face. The downside of that is, more often than not, in such small locations that we have, you end up knowing who the people are even before you see the face shot, and once you get more and more comfortable and you find less and less fear based on whatever program you are in, you start to change those images. But I really do think a lot of it is based on comfort level of perceived anonymity. Knowing this, I don't want to blame the internet for us taking advantage of world that tries to keep us down. I however want to acknowledge that this medium allows us to FIND, FUCK, FOOL & FORGET a man in a blink of an eye. In this world today time is short and who wants to deal something that isn't working? The internet allows us to escape situations where we meet face to face, who wants to summon up the effort to talk to somebody and to break the ice and to ask them to come home with you; whereas the internet, everybody is there for the same reason; it is very quick, it is very easy. The other reason I feel these 'BULLSHITNIGGAHZ' are making the problem within our community worst is for the mere fact that they are just a continuum of what is happening offline. Safe sex does not seem to hold much meaning; they intend to FUCK safely but rarely do and will continue to put themselves in mortal danger. I know they mean well, they place safe sex only on that profile on BGC & A4A, then they meet up, more than likely there is no discussion about it because, let's say I responded to an ad that said "safer sex only" or we both wrote "safer sex only." However, for me, "safer sex" is "no unprotected anal intercourse" and, for you, "safer sex" is "no anal intercourse at all." And then that is not being discussed. So then you get together and you think that you are going to have a particular kind of experience, you are already there, you are already aroused, and you have SEX because it would be such a shame to waste the time. I wonder why we live our lives as if we are KIDS IN A CANDY STORE? Yes it is fun and exciting, but how does this affect our community as a whole? Can we truly say we are happy with the way we allow the internet to make us hide from the world? How can we not see that we might be winning the battle but not the war? One has to look at the entire culture. For so long as gay men believe that they are defined by promiscuity and anal sex the internet will continue to serve the very thing that is destroying our community. We have to make serious demands upon ourselves as gay men that have too little to do with pleasure, and too much to do with culture and ideology.
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