I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Monday, March 9, 2015


To all gay men who make it a habit of looking down on/making fun of feminine gay men, why do you do that? I didn’t realize that all gay men should be masculine and gay at the same time. All because you blend in with the rest of the society and are able to hide and even deny your sexuality when it conveniences you. That’s how it works, right?

All sarcasm aside, what I’m definitely not okay with is the  belief that sparkly, flamboyant gay men make other “normal” gay men look bad. I believe our culture in general is doing a fine job of that, you know, the church fanatics that want us all put to death and political/religious leaders who have outlawed our lifestyle in other countries.

At a time when we’re supposed to be standing together as a community, we couldn’t be farther apart. Gay men don’t even accept each other, yet we want the same rights as everyone else. We should be united, but instead we’re worried about how someone else who’s going through the same struggles as any gay man might make us be perceived by others.

The ironic thing about it all is that you look down on feminine gay men because they’re actually stronger than you. Anyone who can get up and walk out of their house knowing they will be rejected by most of the people they run into has to be strong and thick-skinned. There’s no alternative. So, then, it makes sense that you would have a problem with someone who’s brave enough to be the person you don’t have the guts to be.

Feminine gay men don’t need to become more masculine to make you more comfortable, just like you don’t have to become completely straight just to make suspiciously-curious homophobes more comfortable. There’s no such thing as gender norms. That’s yet another hold-back element invented by our male-dominated culture.


  1. Great reflection! Just be yourself and let other be themselves!

  2. I totally agree with the fact that feminine gays are stronger . And I agree that should also be respect for the individuality of each. But I just want to expose the person that I am. I 'm not that kind of guy . I'm a Gay masculine and I like it. I like being a manly man!!!! this is not the problem. I think nowadays , we , masculine gays, we want to show that there is something more. That there is not only the gay feminine type. Sorry for bad grammar ;-)

  3. BRAVA no truer words have ever been spoken or pinned.....Us bottoms are the stronger know the old addage, you hate what you can not be or cannot the case the masculines hate the tops cause they know we are the strongest of the two. Boom!



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