When is too
soon or too late for a gay man to have sex? Does the timeline of when he gives
in affect how men see him? As with most things when it comes to gay men the
answer is, YES!
For most gay men,
there is no such thing as too soon to have sex, is there? Can we as gay men differentiate between when men want sex and
when men expect sex?
Well, my naked brother, you asked. In my humble opinion, there is no magic equation or formula for determining the difference between "easy" and "sincere." The "right" moment depends on the men involved and their dynamics. In my own experience, one of the worst relationships I had was with a man with whom we abstained from sex for almost three months into dating. The best, to date, is a man I bedded in lieu of a first date. Everyone and every situation is different.
ReplyDeleteI always tell gay men don't put pressure on yourselves and do not allow the fear of being promiscuous get in the way of you have and enjoyable experience with another man.
DeleteI don't believe waiting or not should have a set number on it. I have personally never seen any value. "Dating" is fake, everyone putting on a show, trying to sell the goods. I figure starting off honest and forthright is better. So generally I use sex in lieu of a first date and see if its worth getting to know each other better.
ReplyDeleteI am right with you on that. When I met Noel he told me from the start that he didn't want us to be just sex and here we are almost 6 years lata :)
DeleteWhen I met C it was just supposed to be for a fun week of sex. If somebody told me two years later we'd be married with him putting my ass through school I'd say they were crazy.
DeleteSo where are the wedding pix?
DeleteLOL, I never had a fear of being promiscuous- it was my so-called friends and mentors (none of whom were gettin it regular) who labeled me 'slut'. I wore that badge proudly and left some big shoes to fill. My only regret is that it all ended too soon; or maybe not. There's much to be said for true love.
ReplyDeleteSo you are about to get back there sir?
DeleteThe very first sex I had with another man was terrible. I came away feeling "used" for his pleasure only and also "dirty"! It was only when I became promiscuous that I started to enjoy sex. I was in a relationship for 23 years, but it was an 'open" relationship and I continued to visit the baths and other gay places. My friend and I had true love, but not much sex. He never stopped me seeking sex elsewhere.
ReplyDeleteSo you are single now?
DeleteI love your articles, man!! So fresh and funny!!
ReplyDelete