❤️ DREAM BIG WHEN IT COMES TO FINDING THE RIGHT PARTNER ❣️

I am looking at this married friend of mine, who, although is being taken good care of and treated well by his hubby, is obviously miserable in their relationship. And I am thinking, “Why did he have to settle for this guy when he knew from the very beginning that he was doomed to the most boring and ordinary life with him!” Plus, a remote control would do a better job than him in bed!

People choose to settle in an easy, uncomplicated relationship rather than keep looking for their perfect match for various reasons. For one, because they are sick of being single. Or because, after years of dating and sleeping around, they’ve stopped believing in true love. Whatever the reasons, though, to me personally, settling for less in a relationship is an unforgivable act of betrayal to yourself… and romantic love!

HOW TO TELL IF YOU HAVE SETTLED FOR LESS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

The signs are clear to everyone, but you. Here's what to look for.
First of all, you don’t enjoy being with him - you'd rather be alone than in his company. Second of all, you’ve lost touch with your true self. In order to keep him satisfied, you are faking interests in hobbies, movies, and music, lying about your past, ghosting your old friends, and all in all, you have the feeling that you’re playing a role in someone else’s life. But the most disturbing sign is if he’s treating you poorly. If your partner is abusive in any way, physically, verbally, or emotionally, that is the reddest flag of them all that you are in a wrong relationship.

SETTLING FOR AVERAGE IS NOT ALWAYS A BAD THING… BUT FOR WOMEN

If you, gentlemen, happen to glance through girls' magazines from time to time, then you’ve probably come upon articles where certified psychologists claim that settling for average is in many cases the key to a happy relationship. But here’s the thing: Those who are actually happy to settle for something sustainable are women in their late 30s, inside of whom the biological clock is ticking with a deafening crescendo.

What if you are not a woman whose reproductive system has gone on red alert? Should you, too, settle for average? Although times have drastically changed for women, too, and now, they are more independent, emancipated, and outspoken than ever before, there’s still this razor-like, primordial feeling of fear that’s eating them: Am I gonna be left on the shelf - unmarried, and childless?…

If it is about having babies, men’s problem is far smaller than women’s. Well, it might be a bit more complicated for gay men to have offspring, but, fortunately, gay partners nowadays can have lots of them, babies, with surrogate mothers, or through adoption.

The bottom line is if you are a guy, and you can hear your biological clock ticking too, there’s no need for you to be with somebody you don’t actually love just to have kids!

IF YOU’RE STILL SINGLE, IT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE A SLUT

One of the reasons why gay men feel the pressure to settle the way the 30-something-year-old women do is not to be seen as “sluts” by the members of their community. Which, correct me if I’m wrong, rarely happens to a heterosexual guy who goes around fucking chicks for sports. What I’m saying is that homosexual men face the same double-standard as heterosexual women do. More or less. But just because a clique of 70-year-old queens thinks you’re not a boyfriend/husband material shouldn’t be a good reason to settle for someone who’s not the right one for you just to prove them wrong.

KEEP YOUR STANDARDS HIGH

A recent set of studies by the American Psychological Association shows that people who fear being single are more likely to put up with a dissatisfying relationship. They try to convince themselves that if they lower their standards they’ll find а partner much easier. For them finding love is like playing the “musical chairs” game - taking any seat, i.e. any relationship is better than none at all. But does taking “any seat” guarantee happiness? Not at all. The researchers found that the fearful participants who were in a relationship were аctually as depressed and miserable as the fearful participants who were single. You see, there is no point whatsoever in lowering your standards because, single, or no single, you can feel fucked up in life and love.

WAITING FOR TRUE LOVE IS WORTH THE RISK

I am not trying here to pump up your expectations too much because there’s indeed a fair chance you won't find true love. Ever. But I can assure you that if you decide to stick to your guns and keep looking for the perfect man, the payoff will be much bigger when you eventually find him.

SOURCE: ANDREW CHRISTIAN