Pages

I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.

Followers

Monday, June 13, 2016

BRO-ING OUT: STRAIGHT GUYS, GAY SEX

Has a straight dude’s straightness ever seemed, well, a little gay? Whether it’s the inherent homoeroticism of fraternity life or the scantily-clad antics of the world’s Steve-Os and Johnny Knoxvilles, straight bro culture comes off as less hetero than they’d have us believe.
“We actually know very little about the complexities of straight male sexuality and desires that sit outside of the heterosexual-homosexual binary,” says Jane Ward, author of Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men. “I’m drawing attention to the way that straight men exceptionalize their homosexual behavior as a way of making it invisible.”
While most would hardly bat an eye at young straight women making out at a party or even fooling around in the bedroom, there’s a complex series of patriarchal social ideologies that bar straight men from doing the same. Ward isn’t set on outing anyone; instead, she’s looking to alter popular discourse suggesting that straight-identifying white men who masturbate with one another and post M4M Craigslist ads are self-hating and closeted. They are “straight” in terms of the mainstream gay-straight system, but she argues that that binary itself is faulty. “I’m invested in us having a more nuanced understanding of straight men’s sexuality,” she says. “They’re not invited to be bi-curious in the same way that women are.” Just as college-age women experiment without identifying as lesbian, many straight white men have fluid sexual desires. They’re simply enacted in a way that adheres to society’s hetero norms.
This latent desire for homosexual play in bro culture is usually seen in less explicit ways than with circle jerks and glory holes. “You really can’t go out and ask straight men, ‘Have you had sex with men?’ and get the answer that you’re looking for,” Ward says. “So many of these behaviors are not conceptualized as sexual by the participants.” Instead, answers to questions like, “Have you ever touched a penis?” or “Have you ever put a finger inside another man’s butt?” begin to draw a more complex picture of a straight identified guy’s sexuality. Ward cites fraternity hazing, the Jackass franchise, and men who watch porn together as indicators of this more complicated sexuality. “The men involved think of it as fucking around: ’We’re joking. We’re drunk. This is hazing. It’s not sexual.’ And yet the actual body contact certainly would be called sex if it was something two gay men engaged in.”
Look no further than the elephant walk, a fraternity phenomenon Ward describes in Not Gay’s opening pages. A relatively common hazing ritual, it has fraternity pledges stand nude in a circle with one thumb in their mouth and their other up their neighbor’s butt. They then parade around like a line of circus elephants, trunk to tail, in step with their future brothers’ playful jeers and hollers. Rituals like this are, of course, posed under the guise of humiliation, and they’re certainly embarrassing for many young pledges. But Ward’s photographic and anecdotal evidence from such events show participants laughing along, enjoying the ride.
“Is there pressure involved? Sure. But they’re manufacturing the ritual and participating in it themselves,” Ward says. “Most men know that they could walk away from that situation.”
While it might seem like the realm of gay porn fantasy—there’s a reason why there are so many military and fraternity-themed “gay for pay” porn sites—Ward insists that in arenas of hyper-masculinity like the frat house, homosexual experimentation has a home, even if it manifests as a “too straight to care” pose.

“If you’re a straight man, and you’re so balls-out and you’re so brave, this is something you might do just to show that you can,” Ward explains. “You stand up unbroken, still heterosexual, even after letting another dude suck your dick.”

SOURCE: NEXT MAGAZINE

No comments:

Post a Comment

LINKWITHIN

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...