I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Wednesday, October 22, 2014


You’ve done it. You’ve found him. The man of your dreams. He’s charming, he’s romantic and he won’t tell your mother you met on Grindr. For once, you’ve found Mr Right instead of Mr Right Now. But as always, there’s just one small catch, you’re a top, and so is he.

You spot Mr. Right across the dancefloor, while out for casual drinks with friends. You both gave each other the usual shy smile, the lingering gaze. Fast forward an hour and four vodka shots later you decided to invite him back to your place. Then comes the awkward moment we all hope will never arise in these encounters. You look at him, he looks @ you and it’s clear that we’re both saying the same thing…"I’m not bottoming".

Now don’t get me wrong, I know we all want sex because frankly we enjoy it. But if you think past that, and let’s be honest gay men don’t often acknowledge it, sex is about much more than a quick pump and dump, especially with a partner. Sex secures a relationship; it brings you together intimately as well as physically.

Would you be willing to walk away from a man that captures you due to you both being tops?

Would/could you settle for everything else that comes with being intimate with another man i.e. chatting, spooning and all the other things that lead up to sex? 


  1. Relationships are about compromise and in this situation, both parties need to learn to bottom. If they do it together and learn and share and grow in this sexual area then chances are they will learn and share and grow in all other areas as well. IMHO

    1. Yes, that, and they can also try frottage (non-penetrative sex) and other forms of outer and intercourse that is just as, if not more satisfying. Never block your love blessings.

      Also, an unpopular opinion, and not one I'd be up for, but if they are a more liberal couple, they may want to consider having threesomes - both of them top one bottom - Again, I'm not here for it, but I'm come to understand that different things work for different couples.

    2. I often think that the 3some thing will lead to problems Kevin T

  2. I would keep an open mind but I'll be honest never happened to me. knock on wood.

    1. I think it is about chemistry and how you fit each other



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