Who would’ve
thought that it would take putting on hooves for the claws to come out. For a
few weeks there, I was starting to think this really was RuPaul’s Best Friend
Race. Down to the final five, Friday night’s Drag Race turned up the heat
between the remaining queens.
The Gayest Ball
Ever had it all: Ribbon dancing! Unicorns! Construction couture!
But before the
gals hoofed it (literally) down the runway, we’ve got puppets!
Though there’s
been a disappointing lack of mini-challenges this season, it’s good to see the
classics. The puppet challenge isn’t too far from the reading challenge, but
there’s an added dose of levity, because, well, puppets. Last night’s puppet
theatre didn’t quite live up to some of the better seasons (season six in
particular was a strong one), but there were a few zingers.
Shea turned out
a Peppermint puppet that was a shrieking, screaming, mean mess. Trinity’s Shea
puppet basically just yelled about being from Chicago. Peppermint’s puppet
version of Alexis Michelle was a singing Broadway diva, but she saved it with a
quick change into Alexis’ green roast makeup. Alexis herself? Not great. She
did a Sasha puppet that ended up just being more mean than funny.
Once again
though it’s Sasha that nailed the humor. Her barbs aimed at Trinity had just
the right amount of bite, but there were also real jokes in there. She scored a
double burn when she accused Trin of being into horse play (sex with Nina) and
pillow play (sex with Nina’s padding).
Her puppet
performance earned Sasha the mini-challenge win and the chance to choreograph
the rhythmic gymnastics opening number on the runway. Unfortunately, Sasha
hasn’t figured out how to intellectualize rhythmic gymnastics, so she struggled
to corral the other queens in rehearsal. Shea dominated with suggestions, and
Alexis felt ignored. It’s the first thing she bitched about in the ep, but it
certainly wasn’t the last.
This season’s
ball looks included a rainbow-themed ensemble, a sexy unicorn and one lewk
inspired by one of the Village People. As far as ball themes go, this one
wasn’t as ridiculous as the Bitch Ball, but it’s pretty close.
Shea took the
win despite a rainbow outfit that looked less like a Pride class and more like
it was bought at a Rainbow. Sasha is a real stunner, but her chic fashions
seemed to go over the judges’ heads. Peppermint’s unicorn look was a little
slouchy, and Alexis trotted out one snooze after another on the runway, landing
them both in the bottom two. Alexis again blamed the other queens for not
discouraging her fashion choices.
Finally, with
all the cannon fodder gone for good, we had the first great lip sync of the
season, and to “Macho Man” no less! We’ve had some good performances before,
but I think this is the first where both queens really felt like they were
fighting to survive. They were both great, but you just can’t out-sync
Peppermint. Ru made the right choice to send Alexis back to Broadway, baby.
Let’s see where
our ladies stand in our rankings below.
1. Since the
beginning, I was convinced Shea was going to runaway with this whole thing. She
still might, but Sasha and Trinity are hot on her heels. I wasn’t wild about
her puppet jokes, and I just didn’t think that “rainbow” dress was sickening
enough to justify failing to satisfy the challenge. However, her construction
worker-inspired outfit was one of the series’ best. Plus, her sexy unicorn made
me feel weird feelings.
2. Sasha slayed
all three parts of last night’s challenge. I am obsessed with her color-blocked
rainbow ensemble, her battlefield unicorn was an excellent choice and, although
it was simple, her cowgirl couture was expertly crafted. Sasha is a lock for
the top three, but can she snatch the crown?
3. Although I
was slow to warm to Trinity, I am all in now. She’s a star. Part of me just
thinks she’s not even aware of how good she is. She thinks she’s just a pageant
girl, but she’s hilarious, she’s creative, she’s got a vision. I love how she
interpreted Policeman last night. Trin is also a good bet for top three, and
she may be the dark horse that wins this whole thing.
4. In a way, I
wish Peppermint was in the bottom two every single week just so we could see
her crush these lip syncs. I mean, I felt like she pulled out that amazing move
from the Janet Jackson “If” video for me personally. It was amazing. Sadly, I
don’t think she has the skillset to outdo the top three ladies in a challenge
or on the runway. At least we’ll get to see her lip sync one more time.
5. I feel badly
that Alexis Michelle had to go out on such a sour note. She’s obviously
incredibly talented, but every single one of those runway looks last night was
a dud. Plus, her defensiveness is such a turnoff. Again she blamed the other
girls for not clocking her outfits before she wore them on the mainstage, and
she even tried to backtalk Michelle. (Big mistake. Huge.) I think her behavior
on the show (and especially on Untucked) made her a bit of a villain, but I
don’t think she deserves to be remembered like another Phi Phi. Instead, I’ll
look back fondly on her Liza and Kris Kardashian.
How would you rank the queens?
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