I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Monday, May 20, 2013


Do you know that parents who usually have insecurities pass these insecurities along to their children without noticing?

On the other hand confident parents usually raise confident children without knowing anything about correct parenting methods.

The reason this happens is that self confidence or lack of it is nothing more than a way of thinking that the person learns during his childhood. This means that self confidence has nothing to do with inheritance or genes but instead its all about a set of beliefs that a person carries.

The good news is that even if you are not a confident person now you can still learn how to think like confident people and so become a confident person. 

How confident people think?

In order to think like confident people you need to understand their way of thinking first so that you can replicate it. The following points will help you understand how confident people think:

·         They think about courage not fear: Most people who want to build self confidence do the mistake of focusing on the traits they want to avoid instead of focusing on the traits they want to acquire. When the subconscious mind finds that someone is thinking of something all the time it starts to help him reach it even if it was something negative!! By focusing on the negative things those people find themselves moving towards the behavior they want to avoid

·         They followed a Role mode: Humans learn best by example, the more you accompany confident people and the more you watch them the more likely you are going to be like them. If your parents didn't manage to make you become a confident person then don't worry you can still find a confident role model and stick to him.

·         Fix your flaws but don't forget to develop your skills Of course you must seek information that can help you conquer your fears and improve your communication skills but on the other hand you must never forget to read about becoming a leader, an alpha male/female and about acting confident. The more you read about these positive traits the more they will become a normal part of your belief system and the closer you will get to them

·         They keep reminding themselves of their points of strength: In the Solid Self confidence program i explained how Confident people always keep reminding themselves of their positive traits and of their accomplishments. This gives them a continuous self confidence boost that helps them stay confident all the time.

·         They don't give any weight to the opinion of others: Confident people don't beg others for approval, they don't care much about the opinion of others and they don't feel bad at all if they were rejected. Simply their sense of self worth comes from within and that's why they don't need any external approval.

·         They attribute rejection to other factors: A confident person never thinks that something is wrong with him when someone rejects him but instead he tries to find any other logical explanation such as "He was too busy thinking to notice me"

How to become more confident

Of course you can't change your thinking patterns over night that's why you must focus on slow and gradual change.

Try to watch yourself talk as much as you can and to modify it a little in order to think like those people.

For example when someone rejects you and you find yourself feeling bad start finding excuses for that person instead of blaming yourself for the rejection.

A thought such as "I did a mistake that resulted in the rejection" can save yourself confidence when compared to a thought like "i am not worthy of being loved"

Self confidence is just a way of thinking. Learn how to think like confident people and you will become a confident person.


  1. It's been said that 'nothing succeeds like success'.

    Success is a powerful confidence-builder; even the little things we manage to achieve, like staying on a diet a day at a time, doing 30 minutes on the stationary bike after avoiding it like the plague, even forcing yourself to get out of bed on a day you are so depressed that you just want to hide in the dark.

    Success becomes a habit when you keep pushing yourself towards a personal goal. The harder you push, the more confidence you build and the easier it gets. And don't forget to give yourself permission to fk up once in a while because you always get a fresh start tomorrow.

    1. SO true, I am always wondering if enough will ever be enough for me.

  2. *20 mins later* As in many instances, the MIND can either be a mad powerful tool or a cunningly powerful weapon.




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