There are hundreds of articles about how to tell whether the guy you are seeing is a sex addict. But what if you think that your own sexual behavior is getting out of control? Is your insatiable appetite for sex a normal thing, or it’s more of a clinical condition? Here are some questions that can help you test your libido.
DO YOU BECOME
EXTREMELY IRRITABLE IF YOUR PARTNER WITHHOLDS YOU FROM SEX WHEN YOU DEMAND IT?
Feeling
uptight because you are not getting any is OK but anger is definitely not a
normal response to a “No”. You can’t expect to get laid on the second the
thought about sex invades your mind and your groins. After all, sex cannot be
assumed just because you bought someone a drink or somebody told you that the
guy you have asked out is “always up to it.” Agitation and anger are a clear
sign that something is wrong.
DO YOU
MASTURBATE A LOT?
And by "a
lot" we mean insanely a lot. The main thing about sex addiction is that
sex or thinking about it occupies a major part of one’s awake time. And the
fact the there is no person available for sex at a given moment won’t stop the
addict from having it! If you masturbate every time you happen to be alone,
whether at home, in the copy room, or at your grandparents', that’s a sign that
you have the opposite of a healthy sex drive.
DO YOU ENGAGE
IN RISKY OR INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL ACTIVITIES?
A lot of us
fantasize about having naughty sex in a dark movie theatre or on a car’s back
seat with a Uber driver. For sex addicts, however, this urge is much stronger
and can manifest itself in high-risk behavior. Public sex, sex without
protection with random call boys, exhibitionism, voyeurism, sex under the
influence of opioids are just a few of the dangerous activities that may send a
person obsessed with sex to the hospital or the police station.
DO YOU KEEP
LYING TO YOUR PARTNER AND EVERYBODY ELSE?
Just like
Kevin Costner’s character in Mr. Brooks (2007) who is a respected businessman
by day and a vicious serial killer by night, sex addicts, too, tend to live
double lives. Especially if they are in a stable relationship! As they have
little or no control over their sexual urge, cheating becomes their second
nature. Because they can’t get enough sex from their partner, they are
constantly seeking it in other places. Simply put, they have to keep up with
the lies if they want to keep both their partner and the option for
extramarital sexual activities.
ARE YOU
OVERWHELMED BY FEELINGS OF SHAME AND REGRET?
At some point,
the sex addict finds oneself being stuck in the vicious circle of
hypersexuality followed by an intense feeling of self-loathing and repentance.
Although you are aware of this repetitive pattern, you are unable to break it
no matter how much you want it.
DO YOU HAVE
THE FEELING THAT YOUR LIFE IS PUT ON HOLD?
You are not in
a relationship, because you find it difficult to stay in one for more than a
couple of weeks. The problem is that by your standards, no-one is
sexually-charged enough to keep up with you. Thinking constantly about sex and
how to get it can result in serious consequences not only for your mental
health but also for your social and personal life. Productivity at work can
also be at risk, which is logical, given that you concentrate more on touching
yourself and eyeing the good-looking colleagues and less on your work
assignments.
We are not the
voice that has to substitute the advice of a healthcare professional, but if
you are exhibiting most of the above symptoms, you’d better consult one. A
psychologist or a specially trained social worker can help you address the
underlying factors that cause your sex addiction, and teach you how to cope
with the persisting thoughts and feelings.
SOURCE: ANDREW CHRISTIAN
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