Love is a
state of your consciousness when you are joyous, when there is a dance in your
being. Something starts vibrating, radiating, from your center;
something starts pulsating around you. It starts reaching people: it can
reach women, it can reach men, it can reach rocks and trees and stars. When I am
talking about love, I am talking about this love: a love that is not a
relationship but a state of being. Always remember: whenever I use the
word love, I use it as a state of being, not as a relationship.
Relationship is
only a very minor aspect of it. But your idea of love is basically that
of a relationship, as if that is all. Relationship is
needed only because most can't be alone. One should be capable of being alone, utterly alone, and yet tremendously
blissful. Then you can
love. Then your love is no longer a need but a sharing, no longer a
necessity. You will not become dependent on the people you love.
You will share-and sharing is beautiful.
But what
ordinarily happens in the world is: You don't have love, the person you
think you love has no love in his being, either, and both are asking for love
from each other. Two beggars begging each other! Hence, the fight ,
the conflict, the continuous quarrel between the lovers--over trivia, over
immaterial things, over trivial things!--but they go on quarreling...
Relationship is
a thing: You cling to it. Relating is a flow, a movement, a
process. You meet a person, you are loving because you have so much love
to give--and the more you give, the more you have....
...And
whosoever allows you to share your joy with him or with her, you feel grateful
to him or her. But it is not a relationship; it is a river like flow.
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