I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Tuesday, January 17, 2012


Research today suggests that the differences between men and
women isn't found in the solar system or even in our brains, but in the way we
view the world around us. The problem with theories that place men in one
corner and women in the other is that they assume all men (or women) are alike. 

These thoughts limit our thinking about gender and what it
means to be a man. Like a jackhammer, they pound into our psyches beliefs about
how men are "supposed" to behave. Usually it's defined as simply the
opposite of how women are perceived. 

Without labels we don't know who we are. We're uncomfortable
with the idea that men show feminine emotion or women behave in masculine ways.
It's better accepted when gender-bending behavior is over the top or characterized
in drag, but more than a few eyebrows are raised when men behave in ways that
don't typical fit male behavior. Without expectations of classic gender roles,
who are we and how do we define ourselves? 


Friends say Eric James
Borges, 19, killed himself Wednesday after having endured a traumatic
coming-out experience.

Borges had worked for the Trevor Project, which described him
as “a dedicated, trained volunteer” in its mission of preventing suicide among
LGBT youth. And he’d taped an It Gets Better
 video that tells the story of how he “was raised
in an extremist Christian household” and was kicked out of his parents’ home.

“My mother knew I was gay and performed an exorcism on me in
an attempt to cure me,” he said in his video. His family told him he was
“disgusting” and “damned to hell.”

Borges also described growing up bullied and eventually
dropping out of high school. “I was stalked, spit on, ostracized, and
physically assaulted,” he said. “My name was not Eric but faggot.”

“Back when I was in the closet, I never dreamed that I would
be able to express my sexuality and have a normal relationship,” he said in the
It Gets Better video.

Borges taped a
video project last year that seemed to bring his dream to life. The video,
shared online, shows him and another boy embracing lovingly and kissing. In

outtakes, a person behind the camera can be heard
whispering “That’s beautiful” as passing cars honk in support.

Watch the final version of Borges’s video project below. “The
underlining subtext of this video is love is universal,” Borges wrote about the
short film. “It has the strength to decimate the threshold of all prejudice,
all inequity. Human relationships, and those who come into our lives, have the
ability to ultimately shape who we are. There is importance in loving each
other the way each of us truly deserves.”

The Trevor Project reacted to the news of Borges death with sadness.

“We are deeply saddened to hear about the tragic death of
EricJames Borges, and our hearts go out to his family and friends, and his
community,” a statement read. “Our main concern right now is that those
affected by his death feel supported and can get the care they need.” 

Those needing support can contact the Trevor Lifeline at
(866) 488-7386.


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