After three
weeks of feel-good vibes, RuPaulâs Drag Race finally gave us a
villain for season 14.
It all starts
innocently enough, as the gals gather following June Jambalayaâs elimination.
Pathological overachiever Jasmine Kennedie cannot resist the opportunity to
feel the Jantasy. (Jantasy, noun /Ëjan(t)ÉsÄâ/ 1. The belief that your undeniable talents are unrecognized by reality
show judges.) What follows is a teary breakdown about not winning last
weekâs ball challenge.
You can
probably imagine how this is received. Luckily, this seasonâs union rep
Kornbread is on the case. She immediately calls out Jasmine for steamrolling
conversations and taking up too much space. The feedback is direct and
actionable. Gauging by the reactions of the other queens, it needed to be said.
In Jasmineâs
defense, self-awareness is not a switch one can merely flip on. You can tell
she genuinely is trying to do right the remainder of the episode, but, ho boy,
itâs a rough ride.
This weekâs challenge splits the queens into two teams to complete a fictional âsuper teaseâ parody montage for the season. The voiceover is provided by Ru and consistent for both teams, so they get to choose how to bring things like âcatfightsâ and âshocking revelationsâ to life.
Itâs one of
those acting challenges where most of the humor comes from the edit. Itâs a
very narrow ask, and a lot of the ladiesâ choices are left on the cutting room
floor.
Ru appoints
last weekâs winner, Willow, and last weekâs lip sync survivor (winner feels
like an overstatement), Maddy Morphosis, team captains. As the last queen
picked, Jasmine chooses to walk her chatterbox over to team Willow, alongside
the recently riled Kornbread.
As the queens
hash out their ideas, the tension between Kornbread and Jasmine on Team Willow
is thicker than Roxxxy Andrewsâ padding. Itâs not that Kornbread is wrong, per se,
but she relentlessly harps on every faux pas Jasmine makes. (And, to be fair,
there are a lot!) Eventually itâs like watching someone rub a puppyâs face into
their mess, and we the viewers are the carpet.
Over on Team
Maddy, we ask the age old question: Can heterosexual men be funny? The jury is
still out, but Maddy does impress with some legit joke pitches that demonstrate
a fluency in drag humor belied by Maddyâs chill, Buffalo Wild Wings vibe.
Predictably,
we get to see the pretty girls struggle to find their funny. Jorgeous and Kerri
canât let go of being sexy long enough to make fools of themselves. Puerto
Rican pageant princess Alyssa Hunter doesnât have a lot of funny ideas to
contribute, and during filming she misses key set-ups for punchlines. It feels
reductive to blame it all on language barrier. It feels much more like Alyssa,
like so many pageant queens before her, just doesnât excel at this brand of
humor.
The finished
products are pretty good! On Team Willow, the team captain totally slays with
jokes even Marc Maron would appreciate. My favorite bit involves realizing
sheâs not competing for a shot at love with Jeffrey Boyer-Chapman on The
Bitchelor. She secures a top spot with a great interpretation of this
weekâs âNight of 1,000 J.Losâ runway, choosing to wear one of J.Loâs most Romy
and Michelle ensembles from her first Grammy Awards in 1998. Itâs basically camp, and
the judges eat it up.
Some of her
teammates are not as successful. Iconic guest judge [everybody say] Loni Love
reads Kornbread for relying on fat jokes, which is a valid criticism. However,
Kornbreadâs Met Gala-inspired runway is stunning. It doesnât feel like the
performance is worth of a bottom-three finish. Kornbread was still funny, still
went for it, and she looked great on the mainstage.
Kerri also
looks incredible in the actual green Versace dress J.Lo wore in 2019 as an
homage to her legendary lewk from 20 years earlier. Not a recreation, not a
copy, THE DRESS. Like, the fabric has graced both ladiesâ skin.
Itâs an
impressive sight, but is it an impressive achievement? It doesnât really
showcase Kerriâs personal taste, talent, ingenuity, point of view or anything
other than her personal connections. Once the immediate shock reaction wears
off, itâs actually a little disappointing.
Her comedy is
a lot disappointing. Thereâs just no âthereâ there. Sheâs relying on pretty.
Itâs bottom two for her.
Team Maddy
fares better overall with DeJa and eventual winner Angeria taking top spots.
DeJa especially shines this week, giving us slapstick, character, one-liners
and some actual acting. If her runway was better, sheâd have my vote for this
weekâs win.
Instead, that
goes to Angeria. As usual, she looks great on the mainstage dripping stones as
J.Lo at the Met Gala 2019. Even more than Kerriâs genuine artifact, Angeria
just knows how to make the judges (and audience) gag on her eleganza. Sheâs
undeniably funny in the clip, but the humor is much more personality-driven
than cleverly crafted. Itâs no less valid (especially in this context), but
depending on your personal tastes, your mileage may vary.
That leaves
Alyssa to lip sync against Kerri to âPlayâ by J.Lo. The sync leaves a lot to be
desired. Kerri is clearly trying not to damage the dress, so her range of
motion is âlimited.â Alyssa attempts to incorporate one of those cash guns, but
it jams in a big âwomp, wompâ moment.
Alyssa is
certainly doing more overall, but this isnât a dance competition. Personally, I
found Alyssaâs efforts to impress to be a bit frantic and disconnected from the
energy of the song. Even though Kerri is decidedly sleepier, she punctuates
some lines with facial expressions, and there was almost something charming
about her ease.
Thatâs why I
donât feel Alyssaâs elimination is the injustice some folks on Twitter seem to
think it is. A successful pageant girl, she doesnât need a lowly recapper like
me to tell her sheâs talented and gorgeous. However, this show looks for some
very specific criteria, and Iâm not sure Alyssa has the full arsenal Ru is
looking for.
How are our ladies faring after the first comedy challenge? Letâs take stock with our rankings below.
1.
Angeria continues to ride a wave of momentum, racking up another win (her third,
if you include the mini-challenge). Even when the judges fawn over her runways,
I still feel like theyâre underselling how beautiful the garments are. Plus,
sheâs got an irresistible personality AND can make Ru laugh? So far, no notes!
2.
Thereâs a good case to be made that Willow is
the true top contender this season. After a ⊠letâs call it âdisarmingâ âŠ
entrance look, Willow unleashed an original vision that extends from
performance to fashion. She was funnier than anything the writers for this show
have ever come up with, and her J.Lo outfit was outside-the-box, hideous, beautiful
and perfect all at once. I give the slight edge to Angeria, because thereâs
potential for Willow to easily go too cerebral and alienate the judges. Angeria
is more aligned with what works on this show.
3.
Why arenât we talking more about Bosco?
She cracks me up in the confessionals, she regularly transforms her face with
different makeup techniques, and, even when her runways are a little similar,
thereâs a lot of thought there. I like what she brought to the teaser, though
she was a bit hampered working with the so-so Jorgeous.
4.
There was nothing wrong with Kornbreadâs
work this week, but once the judges get one of these ideas in their heads, it
tends to stick. While she initially seemed squarely in the right during the
conflict with Jasmine, her doggedness quickly became off-putting. I didnât find
her performance any more obvious than Angeriaâs, but I agree it was a bit
one-note. Then again, like, this is a super cut? Thereâs not exactly room for
character development. Plus, she had one of my favorite looks on the runway.
She shouldâve been safe.
5.
Jasmine hasnât hit peak levels of insufferability for me as a viewer, even
if she may have long past that point for her fellow cast members. We know she
can sew. We know she can dance. We know sheâs got some exquisite gowns. She
even delivered decent enough comedy. Her competency is well established, but
can she wow the judges with any particular mastery?
6.
Itâs a shame for Jorgeous this
was the J.Lo episode. I like the mirrorball nude-illusion bodysuit inspired by
a similar outfit Jennifer wore to something called the âSuper Bowl.â But, more
than that, I loved her J.Lo dance moves, which were super specific and
recognizable. Unfortunately, the comedy just wasnât there.
7.
Meanwhile, DeJa comes
charging back into the competition. She landed early in the bottom two, but this week
absolutely slayed every scene she was in. Oddly enough for this established
seamstress, her runway was my problem (and kept her from an even higher
ranking). Ross correctly clocked the design for not being close enough to
J.Loâs original, but I could not disagree more with his assertion that DeJaâs
was an improvement. It was more like a knockoff Halloween costume for âDance
Diva from the Bronx.â
8.
I guess Lady Camden was
trying to sell a character that, underneath all the red, white and blue
regalia, was secretly British. Um, ok? Since the edit didnât provide that
context, it just sort of read as bizarre. These other queens are here to play
this season, and several have already made very strong impressions. The clock
(Big Ben, in this case) is ticking.
9.
There wasnât too much Daya to
discuss in this episode, but sheâs been proving worthy of the second chance, no
matter how sloppily it was justified by Ru.
10. Iâm still a big Kerri Colby fan, but being told youâre
too concerned with being pretty is a kiss of death. Of course the dress was
incredible. Of course. It was incredible when J.Lo did it. Twice. Iâm also
being pretty generous about the lip sync. Hopefully in a less precious garment,
sheâs got more to give.
11. Orionâs J.Lo lewk was faithfully recreated by
hand, and she held her own during the tease. A solid, safe week, but sheâs got
to give us something memorable to erase the bad taste from her first talent
show performance.
12. Eep! I donât mean to harp on Maddy, but ⊠her best work
(coming out as straight) was cut from the final teaser and her runway looked
very off-the-rack, J.Lo inauguration-by-way-of-ASOS.
13. Itâs not that I think Alyssa is the least talented
queen here; itâs just I think she was the least successful at this competition
after this week.
How would you
rank the queens?
SOURCE: TOWLEROAD
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