I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Thursday, June 6, 2013


What the hell is "straight-acting?" I suppose, since I spent much of my life in various insecure stages of denial, suppression, hiding, self-judgment and self hatred and acting out the stereotypes, myths and misconceptions of being "straight" I was at one time indeed "straight-acting."

Now, when I see gay men state that they are "straight-acting" on the net, I sometimes ask them: "If you were 'straight-acting' wouldn't you be posting in the 'men seeking woman' (m4w) section or on Adam 4 Eve?" Too many of us (gay men) place each other into the "straight-acting" or "effeminate" box and I often wonder why. Moreover should we labeling each other? And if we don’t, how else would we define each other?

How about we don't have to call it anything, perhaps we could just accept that we humans come in a wonderfully interesting and diverse array of personalities, traits, behaviors and ways in which we innately desire and crave to experience and express love and sex. The very word "effeminate," when applied to gay men, seems to suggest that they’re "not like a man" but "more like a female," and therefore plays right into myths, misconceptions and stereotypes of what is "masculine" and what is "feminine."

It's time to drop the stereotypes, drop the labels, drop the myths and misconceptions of manhood, and start embracing and accepting people, all people, for who and what we are starting with and including (and perhaps most importantly) ourselves! I don’t “act” straight/gay, I am just, a guy who happens to be emotionally and physically attracted to men. Yes, I know, sounds pretty gay, and indeed it is!


Can you focus your attention on this model's eyes?

A new ad from ES Collection challenges you to look into the eyes of Kirill Dowidoff. But like the title of the ad suggests, it’s “hard to resist” looking elsewhere. Watch the video and find out where your eyes wander. Did you get distracted by his chiseled body? Or were you enamored with his face that was a cross between Channing Tatum and Andy Roddick?

Either way, you’re rewarded with a GIF set below.

Did you stay focused?



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