I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Saturday, May 10, 2008


For as long as I can remember, I have been asking my friends to have a surprise party for me. Now I know there are persons out there that would say if they did it wouldn’t be much of a surprise; I guess for me it was just the thought of it that made me ask for year after year. Now flash forward to the present I knew my EARTH~DAY was on the horizon and like clock work I mentioned…OKAY I talked about having a surprise party every chance I got. So when my EARTH~DAY arrived I didn’t really expect a party, but I @ least expected my friends to @ least hang out with me…BUT THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN! From being told they were too tired OR didn’t have enough time to think of anything that they could do to mark this momentous occasion I was left on my own. Naturally I felt let down AND disappointed because I felt that my friends were behaving in a way that was selfish AND uncaring. So I decided to keep my distance AND not bother anyone I guess it was my way of processing my disappointment without sinking into despondency. As with any emotional response, I honor my feelings by feeling them fully, without acting on them…most of the time…They say that with age comes wisdom but today proved how wrong that quotation is when it comes to me. One would think that I should know better and that my friends wouldn’t forget me on this special day, but what can I say? I was so disenchanted by my friends that I couldn’t enjoy THE surprise party that they had for me because I was surprised @ myself for not seeing this coming. And I guess this is way they say that life is a circular journey through our issues and processes, because somehow this event was technically new yet it seemed very familiar. But after all is said and done, they achieved their goal of making me feel left out AND forgotten. ALL-IN-ALL it was a GREAT party and I couldn’t have asked for anything more. I CAN TRULY SAY THAT I HAVE COME FULL CIRCLE & THAT I HAVE ARRIVED IN A FAMILIAR PLACE THAT SHOWS THAT I HAVE GROWN & MY LIFE ISN’T LOST ON MY FRIENDS. WITH THIS LIFE CHANGING EVENT I HAVE STEPPED INTO A CLEARING THAT SHOWS WHERE I CAME FROM & WHERE I STAND @ THE SAME TIME. SO I WANT TO SAY THANK YOU TO ALL THOSE THAT TOOK THE TIME & ENERGY TO DO THIS FOR ME, IT IS A GREAT WAY TO START ANOTHER DECADE OF MY LIFE…


If you're among the many men who try to keep an eye on their weight but still have a sweet tooth, I have some good news: You can now have your cake and eat it too -- as long as it's low fat. I've listed the worst desserts you can eat if you're trying to lose your gut, and recommended some healthier alternatives that will hopefully satisfy your sweet craving. I have to admit that no dessert is really "healthy," but if you must have it, my suggestions will be more sympathetic to your waistline. the seven deadly sins Loaded with fat, calories and cholesterol, these sweet indulgences are sure to put an end to any weight-loss goal. I've provided the frightening fat and calorie breakdowns for a single serving size ofeach tasty -- but deadly -- dessert listed below.

  1. Oreo Cookies # Serving size: About 3 cookies # Fat: 7 grams # Calories: 160 (about 50 calories per Oreo) Oreos don't seem too bad per serving, but can you really eat just three? Oreo cookies -- the tasty sandwich cookies that are so fun to dunk--are high on our list of worst desserts. They contain roughly 60% fat and are extremely high in Trans fat, which has been linked to heart problems and diabetes. Oreo, the best-selling cookie in the world, has been under the microscope recently, as scientists study the effects of sugary andfatty snacks on the brain. Reportedly, Oreos top the list of cookies that people crave most. Furthermore, there is ongoing neurological research that shows that Oreos may be addictive. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: Snack Wells Vanilla Crème Sandwich cookies. We know that it's hard to compare any cookie with the world-famous Oreo, but Snack Wells' sandwich cookies do not taste low fat, and they will give you the same crème-filled satisfaction as Oreos at a fraction of the calories and fat. For a serving of two to three cookies, there are only 3 grams of fat and 110 calories.

  2. Ben & Jerry's Chubby Hubby Ice Cream # Serving size: ½ cup # Fat: 20 grams # Calories: 330. Don't be fooled by the tie-dyed packaging and colorful "peace andlove" mantra that Ben & Jerry's exude. Although these Vermont-grown organic hippies are socially responsible business partners (they crusade for a clean environment and world peace), they are definitely not doing you any favors when it comes to watching your weight. We've used a popular example, "Chubby Hubby," which is vanilla and fudge ice cream loaded with fudge-covered peanut butter pretzels. Ben & Jerry's may use the finest ingredients, but they also deliver the most fat and calories. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: Dryer's Vanilla Chocolate Swirl Frozen Yogurt. The funky flavors of Ben & Jerry's are hard to imitate, but if you are craving ice cream, this healthy alternative is a good substitute. It is a frozen yogurt, but it has the same consistency as regular ice cream and tastes almost as sweet. With 0 grams of fat and 90 calories per ½ cup, it might be wise to consider sacrificing the fudge-covered peanut butter pretzels.

  3. Otis Spunk Meyer Iced Chocolate Brownies # Serving size: 1 brownie # Fat: 11.5 grams # Calories: 260 Otis Spunk Meyer brownies may look harmless, but these iced, gooey treats will haunt your waistline long after you've eaten them. There are more than 20 ingredients in these little chocolate snacks, including hydrogenated oils, high fructose corn syrup and many other unhealthy culprits. For the benefit of your health, it might be worth investing in the eggs and store-bought brownie mix needed to bake your own. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: No Pudge! Brownie Mix. I know that it's not ideal to actually make your own dessert--especially when you want a quick fix -- but this non-fat brownie mix only requires the addition of water and a little stirring. The No Pudge! Brownie Mix brownies are remarkably moister and chocolatier than regular low-fat or non-fat brownies. They have 0 grams of fat and only 90 calories per 2-inch square brownie. I don't advise it, but you can practically eat the whole pan and still ingest fewer calories than with the Otis counterpart.

  4. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups (Double Chocolate) # Serving size: 1 package # Fat: 11 grams # Calories: 210 Peanut butter is rearing its fattening head again, as it is now being touted as a high-protein food. Nutritionists claim that peanuts are high in energy, fiber, vitamin E, and other trace minerals that should be included in a healthy diet for weight maintenance and overall good health. Unfortunately, the nutritional benefits of peanut butter cannot be fulfilled by Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. The incredibly high fat and calorie content make Reese's Peanut Butter Cups one of the worst candy bars to eat if you're trying to maintain or lose weight. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: 3 Musketeers Miniatures. Nothing can rival the creamy peanut butter and chocolate taste of a Reese's, but if a candy bar is what you crave, try 3 Musketeers Miniatures instead. One 3 Musketeers miniature snack bag contains 7 pieces, which should definitely satisfy your candy bar craving. And with only 5 grams of fat and 170 calories, it is also a good bet for your waistline.

  5. Sara Lee Classic New York Cheesecake # Serving size (1/6 of a regular size cheesecake) # Fat: 21 grams # Calories: 350 This is a dessert that actually has the audacity to combine two of the most fattening foods in its name -- "cheese" and "cake." The appeal of cheesecake is no secret to anyone. Who can resist the satisfying ingredients of cream cheese, whole milk, cream, and sugar? But, this dessert is not only extraordinarily high in fat and calories, it is also full of Trans fat, cholesterol and carbs. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: Jell-O Brand Cheesecake Cups. These individually wrapped pudding-like cups have the same creamy cheesecake flavor as the real thing, but with only 4.5 grams of fat and 150 calories.

  6. Little Debbie Nutty Bars # Serving size: 1 individually wrapped package# Fat: 19 grams # Calories: 312 Little Debbie has been an American household name since the early 1960s, providing Americans with relatively inexpensive cakes, cookies and breakfast items. The innocent-looking girl on the packaging might be a decoy for the fat, sugar and cholesterol lurking inside, because there is nothing sweet about the brand that has ranked No. 6 on my worst desserts list. Nutty Bars -- light, peanut butter-filled wafers covered with fudge -- are high in fat and calories, and extremely high in sodium. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: Fifty50 Sugar Free Chocolate Wafer Cookies. The Fifty50 sugar-free wafer brand is made for people who are following a low glycemic index diet, which also makes them a healthier choice for people who need to monitor their blood sugar levels. Fifty50 cookies aren't perfect with 9 grams of fat and 160 calories for six wafers, but they do have the same great crunch and light texture as the Nutty Bars.

  7. Banana Split # Serving size: 1 split # Fat: 43 grams # Calories: 894 while dining out, it is possible that you might encounter the classic banana split. It has bananas, which are healthy, but they might be the only healthy part of this monster. This deceitful dessert will pack on the pounds faster than any other dessert on our list (if for nothing else than the pure size of it). It is simply too easy to spoon away every last bite of the beast that has been placed before you. Nutritionally, the banana split contains a large portion of the daily caloric requirements and more than the daily allowance of fat that the average man should consume. HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: Jell-O Sundae Toppers. These desserts are individually packaged, which makes it easy to know how large one portion is. And with only 1.5 grams of fat and 110 calories, you can rest easy that they will not break your diet regimen. If you miss the banana in the banana split, slice one up and have it with your Sundae Topper; it only tacks on about 100 calories (depending on the size), and it is high in potassium, vitamin B6 and fiber. Deadly desserts everyone knows that desserts do not usually make the list of foods to eat if you are trying to maintain a healthy weight. However, it is impossible to satisfy a sweet craving by substituting the low-fat options we've listed above. Like everything good in life, a healthy diet should be varied and all foods should be eaten in moderation. Have an Oreo if you want one! Just be sure to watch portion sizes and moderate the frequency of indulgence.


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