I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Monday, December 2, 2013


I didn’t really think I had an opinion on HIV. I realise this may sound ignorant or misguided but I grew up in the late 1980's and early 1990's so my teenage years were not a time that really allowed me to discover my sexuality. My abiding memory of that time and my attitude towards sex was one of curiosity. HIV/AIDS was portrayed as the disease to end all humanity. All I know is that if you became infected with HIV, it would rapidly lead to AIDS and then you'd die.

The 'gay curse,' as it was known, was something to fear. There wasn't anything remotely sexy about ‘barebacking’ and it had yet to be fetishized. Not only was it dangerous, it seemed outdated, old fashioned and best left in whispers at the club and social gatherings. Strange how many gay men kept their ‘barebacking’ activity a secret because of the fear of anyone thinking they might get AIDS. Being gay you were warned that the very first time you had unsafe sex you would become infected with HIV. I didn’t take on this view point because I had a relationship and how could I not ‘bareback’ the first time I was going to experience a man for the first time.

I don't take my being HIV-negative for granted but I also don’t allow a fear of HIV to stop me doing what I want to do. My fear of HIV had forced me into a kind of sexual schizophrenia. The way I looked and presented myself and the way I was feeling were completely different. In my 20s, I left a vast number of men with huge erections. I'm not talking up my attractiveness, I'm just saying that although men came knocking, I didn’t open the door. My attitude towards sex has changed and I'm confident in my sexuality. I'm also fully aware of the 'risks', and I’ve realized that a penis isn’t a murder weapon. 


TMZ reports that Walker was in a Porsche Carrera GT when the driver somehow lost control of the vehicle. It then slammed into either a post or a tree and then burst into flames and exploded.

It is not yet known what caused the driver to lose control, but the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department said that the crash happened around 3:30 p.m. in the 28300 clock of Rye Canyon Loop.

Walker's other credits include “Varsity Blues,” "Into the Blue," “Flags of Our Fathers” and “Takers.” He is survived by his 15-year-old daughter, Meadow.

UPDATE (Dec. 1, 8:45 a.m. EST): Although it's unclear what caused the accident, authorities have said speed appears to have played a major factor.

UPDATE (Dec. 1, 11:00 a.m. EST): The driver in the fatal crash that killed Paul Walker has reportedly been identified as 38-year-old Roger Rodas. According to local reports, Rodas was the CEO of automotive company Always Evolving, and the pair was in his 2005 Porsche Carrera GT when he lost control of the car and struck a tree. Walker, a car aficionado, was allegedly one of Always Evolving’s owners, and Rodas himself was a former race car driver.

According to TMZ, Walker and Rodas' bodies were burned so badly in the crash that they're currently unidentifiable and their autopsies will be delayed until later this week. A rep for the L.A. County Coroner tells TMZ that the coroner is waiting on both sets of dental records before proceeding.



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