I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.

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Thursday, June 19, 2008

WHEN YOU GROW UP


There comes a time when a man emerges out of the carcass of boyhood and takes that ever important first step into adulthood. This rite of passage is VERY significant in his life because that is the moment he takes responsibility for his THOUGHTS, WORDS & DEEDS. Now what happens when this young mans grows up AND regret the things he did on the road to manhood? This life that we lead is filled with the so many things that are unexplained AND when it comes to SEXUALITY most of us take the time to find out what those things are all about. I write this entry and ponder this topic because I was chatting with a young man today and he was VERY upset over the fact that HIS friends won’t let him shed what he calls his pass and go on anew. I say what he calls his pass because he still makes advances towards me, though I don’t hold it against him, this just proves that he STILL has some ground to cover. I must admit that when I met him I allowed him to give me a blow job and I played some part in the person who he is today (I GUESS THAT’S WHY I TALK TO HIM STILL) but I digress…I can’t imagine how he must feel being stuck in a place that he doesn’t want to be while trying to change. From my conversation with him I gathered that he is concerned about what he did, but even more so about those that know what he did. Before I met him, I heard stories about him and the things he did. So when I did he lived up to his reputation…he even wanted me to F&CK him on the beach without a condom OR lube. Of course I refused, I am NO ASS! So I am sure he does not know what do OR who to trust. And it is difficult for him to understand, even with hindsight, how the choices he has made have placed him in his current situation. He and he alone have the power to change the story he tells himself by acknowledging that in the past, he did his best, and he exhibited many positive qualities. He needs to recognize that he has to learn from this and NOT go down this again. I know that he feels that he has exhausted himself trying to figure out how to make change, and I am sure he gave up. However, each day offers an opportunity to renew his resolve and to declare to the universe that he is indeed ready for change. It is ONLY when he does this he will make it possible for the future to be based on a positive self-assessment. The inner shift will allow him to get out of the cycle he is stuck in. Allow today to be the day to end cycles and enter into a new way of being. WHEN EVER HE READS THIS, I HOPE HE UNDERSTANDS THAT JUST BECAUSE HE CAN’T SEE CHANGE THAT DOESN’T MEAN IT IS HAPPENING. IT IS JUST A MATTER OF PERSPECTIVE, LIKE A LADYBUG WHO SEES THE LEAF BUT NOT THE TREE THE LEAF GROWS ON. BUT WHATEVER HE CHOOSES TO DO, HE MUST REMEMBER THAT CULTIVATING A RELATIONSHIP WITH THAT WHICH HE CAN’T SEE IS A TIME-HONORED HUMAN PRACTICE THAT CAN GREATLY ENHANCE HIS LIFE…COME ON BOY GROW UP!

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