I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.


Tuesday, May 13, 2008


Sure, we know many of the golden rules about ensuring a great sexual encounter. There’s “always be prepared (i.e. have condoms)” and “communication is key” but what about those “special” rules that distinguish the “Average Joe” from the stellar lover? Here’s a list that’ll leave your partner calling you the Superman Lover for sure…


  • Whoever said that, “It is better to give than receive,” was on to something. The more pleasure you give your partner, the more you’re likely to receive.
  • Excellent hygiene is a must in any bedroom encounter. A fresh shower and well cared for hands and nails are an essential element for any night of passion.
  • Pay attention to the cues and responses from your partner. Being able to respond to what your partner is needing at just the right moment could mean the difference between a grand slam and a strike out.
  • If your partner is doing something right, tell them. After all, no one is a mind reader and who knows what is pleasing to you better than yours truly?


  • Failing to be a team player in the bedroom is an absolute no-no. If you’re all about being pleased without reciprocating pleasure to your partner, chances are slim to none that you’ll see those bed sheets again.
  • Brushing your teeth and trimming your nails seem like a natural thing to do before a date. If a sexual activity is on the menu, however, forgo both of these in order to minimize your risk for contracting an unwanted STD such as HIV/AIDS.
  • “Cookie cutter” lovers are the worst! No two people are the same; therefore add variety to your sexual repertoire. What drove your last partner to climb the bedroom walls may only be met with lukewarm response by your new partner. Remember: creativity and attentiveness are an absolute must!
  • Assuming whether or not your partner wants you to stay or go after your bedroom romp could be a touchy subject after the main event. To avoid a potentially embarrassing situation, have the conversation before you slide in between the sheets.
  • Just some thoughts and ideas of a single black gay man trying to figure out where he is and where everyone else is going.


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